The Mud Race

The Mud Race Transformation butterflies in the dirt

When I was a teen, I used to think about 2020. I’ve been weird since those days. I’ve always had one foot in my present and one in my future, so it made sense for my teenage self to think about the year I would turn 50. And there, I said it: I finally turned 50. I want to stop growing old. I hope there is truth in “50s are the new 40s”, because I have so much to do and so much energy!

This past year, I founded my first company, Eclat Global. I think I have always been in the “transformation” business and now it’s official. As many others, I have taken my passion and experienced it for myself first. I have always questioned who I was, why I was, where should I go, what should I do, what I really wanted , what my mission was, what to do with my talents, what my talents were, how to turn myself into the person I wanted to be, and so on.

This questioning pushed me to explore my psyche from an early age, reaching out to a psychologist for the first time at the age of 17. At the time, I was struggling with my first relationship, my perfectionism, my appearance, an eating disorder, and an absolute confusion about what to do with my life after high school. Like many, I had an intense adolescence. The bad news is that I am still very intense, so those sessions did little about that. The good news: I discovered how to manage that energy, in a way that most of the time it’s positive for me and others.

Exploring my thoughts and feelings from such an early age gave me a sense of possibility. Speaking out loud helped me think, reflect, accept, reject, get to know myself more and more, so my decisions could be aligned with who I really was, and what I really cared about.

If I fast forward to today, this 30-year adventure has included raising a family, studying Law and Human Resources, living in different countries, and managing all the challenges life threw at me each step of the way. Often, this meant diversifying my approach to my own problem-solving: when psychoanalysis was not doing the trick, I leaned into other tools like neuro-linguistic programming, meditation, alchemy, study of religions, philosophy, cleansing diets, yoga, art. 

My work has been to courageously face the fear of meeting myself, the fear of not liking myself and not knowing what to do next. My life has been as messy and painful as it’s been fun, interesting and fulfilling. 

How to transform that mud into glorious joy? By understanding that our transformation is a journey towards becoming ourselves. It is a process of gaining empowerment to experiment our humanity in its full potential. 

I am still walking that journey, discovering aspects of my identity and spirit that are yet to be unearthed. The key difference is that I am not (so) anxious about when that is going to happen, as I know it will when I am ready.

2020 has been a pivotal year for me. I have accomplished very important personal goals that I’ve been working towards for decades, and have had the time to sit quietly to contemplate the success. People may not see any flashy results yet, because honestly there aren’t any. But these are personal ambitious milestones that must be recognized. And how these are reached is also key: Being me with other people is how I do me. It is hard, scary. But it has been the only way I have found true joy, true love and peace.

This is what I mean by transformation: A journey into the core of every person’s most intimate goals, desires, struggles and ambitions, and the path each one takes to discover and realize them. I want to serve and be a medium for people that seek transformation for themselves and others.

Are you ready to join me in this quest?